Okay after 10 minutes of use with very tempered expectations, I'm legit impressed by the Affinity Publisher beta. It's a bit buggy, as expected, but looks promising: https://affinity.serif.com/en-gb/publisher/
Also this Grid and Axis Manager is bananas cool:
The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!